i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
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