If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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