God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
They have beer where we have blood.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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