i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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