i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
