I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Will exercising make me less horny?
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
