I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
