O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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