haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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