Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
