im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
