Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
we made out on top of his cat.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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