You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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