I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
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