i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
PS: I just woke up from my shower
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
