You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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