can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
