I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
