He is such a slut. More and more my type.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Randomize
