youre lurking in front of me
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Randomize
