i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Randomize
