literally had 100 drinks last night.
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
3 2 1 whiskey
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
