i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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