you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Randomize
