Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
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