I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
