Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
