the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize