he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
