I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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