Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Me too!
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
