What a fucking waste of an outfit
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
