I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize
