If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
