In the future we'll all be gay
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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