Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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