Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
