Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
he fucked my hip out of place.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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