so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
Sex in the backyard? Check.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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