Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Randomize
