i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
