We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I wear drunk well.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize
