I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
