How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
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