I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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