I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Randomize
