that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
