just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize
