I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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