Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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